I'm still going through files and I found one old notepad. I sporadically, when reading fanfiction, pick out things that are just too damn hilarious not share. Figuring that you all would appreciate it more then some people. (Cough Cough) No names. Lol. Especially those dear honest to god Harry Potter fans. (Not the movies. They suck. They treat Neville -my hero- like dirt.) So go on and appreciate.

>>Things That Make Me Laugh In Fanfiction;;

It had seemed so simple when Harry reviewed the Plan that
morning at Grimmauld’s Place over a breakfast of toast and
scrambled eggs served by an infinitely friendlier Kreacher.
Infiltrate the Ministry. Steal Umbridge’s locket, said
locket being Voldermort’s Horucrux. Get out as quickly
and stealthy as possible.

XxX

Of course, Hermione thought wryly, Harry being Harry
had to be the one to add lead-a-mass-breakout-of-wrongfully-
arrested-muggleborn-witches-and-wizards-from-right-under-the
-noses-of-Death Eaters-(and Umbridge)-masquerading-as
-Ministry-employees to their agenda. Not that she was
complaining of course, but it really wreaked havoc on
the “sneak out without being noticed” part of the Plan.




Tom looked down at the floor and bit his lip in attempt to
look ashamed, "Well...uhm, I kind of lost my wand during
the summer. I think someone stole it."

"So what you're saying is, you need a new one?"

"Yeah," Tom muttered. Of course I need a new one, you moron!
Lucius has properly snapped mine!

"Well, unfortunately, Ollivander has had an accident with
a dragon, and he is currently in St. Mungos. But
I think he'll be out in a week."


“You forced me to come to Hogwarts!”

“I gave you a choice,” Dumbeldore reminded him.

“Yeah? It was either this, or you would have sent me back
to an orphanage that doesn’t exist!”

“Still, it was a choice.”

“Oh, shut up!” Tom muttered. He turned and walked towards
the door.


"Oh, that's to bad. I'll just have to wait, then."
Damn! Why haven't I wiped the stupid animals from the
face of the earth? A week! A damn, bloody week!